Today I was pondering the jobs I would have if money, experience, and reality didn’t exist. I’ve done a list of this nature (several in fact, as I was soul searching when I lived in Florida), but I believe the original list was created several years ago on a previous blog that I had to delete due to me shooting my mouth off. In the six years that I’ve been blogging (holy shit, that’s a lot of years), I think my list has probably remained fairly consistent (with a few new additions):
– food critc: it incorporates my love of delicious food and writing my opinion. getting paid for both would be pretty rad.
– movie critic: same as above, only movies are expensive and I’m getting cheaper as I edge closer to my 30s.
– full time photographer: I already do this and am working on a project to actually make some money on something that I’m told I do well at. However, if we’re being specific, I would like to be an official photographer for the National Park Service. I’m not entirely sure that’s a real job….details schmetails.
– dog walker: I know this sounds dumb, but it seems rather easy, you get exercise every day, and there are a LOT of rich people out there that want the dog but not the responsibility. And I think Harper would vouch for my fun doggie jogs and walks.
– Hallmark card writer: I assume this sort of fun job probably requires an English degree, or at least some sort of certification in creating tearful, meaningful moments in short phrases. I’m confident that I could do this job well. Mainly because it’s all too often that I’m Hallmark looking for the perfect card, and they just don’t say what I mean. So I end up buying a MikWright card because I can’t stop thinking they’re hilarious. When in doubt, I guess I just go for the hilarious. I think my Dad may be getting this one. Possibly not even for his birthday…just because.
– Clydesdale groomer or buffalo wrangler at Grant’s Farm: I don’t know what you have to do to have this job, but I’m in.
Those are just a few selections. Unfortunately, I’m not extremely close to doing any of those things. If anyone has any suggestions or capital that they want to invest with anticipated low ROI, you know who to call. In the meantime, I’ll just work on internal corporate communications. With a side of hand-holding.
Here’s a recent photo too – maybe it’s evidence of the whole photographer thing. Or maybe I’m just posting it for my friend Rachel who loves elephants as we ponder the fun things we should probably do if money were no option.